Alwajih Wedding

Article

The following story actually occurred chronologically just before my trip to Dubai and England, but I have been awaiting permission to post the related pictures from the wedding.

Normally it is impossible to miss a Yemeni wedding if one visits Sana’a for at least a week. Every Thursday one will find a wedding somewhere in the old city, and they are hard to miss for two reasons: they are brightly lit with lights strung from the houses, and VERY LOUD. However, this part of the wedding is only a small part of the whole process. First of all, this is only the male part of the wedding as women have their own activities (though women often view the men dancing from windows and rooftops). Secondly the entire wedding actually takes place all day. Since Maki is one of my closest friends in Yemen, he asked his family if it would be possible for me to join them throughout the day. They gave him an emphatic “Of course he is welcome!”

The day went like this:

1. Breakfast of sautéd liver with one lone bowl of foul (beans). You might guess who had the foul.
2. Hammam (Turkish bath) visit for some male bonding
3. Dressing of the grooms in traditional wedding gowns
4. Visited home #1 (Meal #1)
5. Visited home #2 (Meal #2)
6. Travel to Photographer
7. Chew Qat with all the friends, family and neighbors of the wedding party
8. Return to Maki’s family home for supper and more male bonding
9. Evening dancing and various activities

All I can say it was really quite different to be able to attend the wedding as a close friend instead of a bystander. I have to say it was probably the best Yemeni wedding I have seen so far. And I am not saying that out of bias. At many weddings I have attended, the groom seems to be off sitting by himself while everyone is blissfully chewing the cud…er…qat. However, at Maki’s wedding I was pleased to see so many people sitting with he and his brothers the whole time.

Another fun thing happened during the day. But I first need to explain what happens when you enter a Yemeni home. As you climb the stairs of the house, it is obligatory to call out “Allah! Allah!” as you ascend the stairs. This gives the women ample warning to enter a room or cover themselves. SO, I thought it was fun when I first entered one of the houses, a group of children were beside the front door. As I entered, many of them stared at me with wide eyes while one hollered out, “ALLLLL–AH!”

After viewing the pictures you’ll probably have a question about the eggs. It’s actually a Yemeni superstition and not Islamic at all. (You may hear Yemeni’s say it’s Islamic, but it’s not.) They take the egg and ritualistically hover it over the groom’s head, then smash it! The idea is that it wards off evil spirits or the “evil eye.” Watch out, it’s easy to get plastered with egg goo if you’re too close.

Also, you’ll probably be interested to know that I will probably never know the name of Maki’s wife, nor will I ever see her. If I met Maki and his wife on the street, she will probably stand behind him while we talk for a bit. Then our conversation will end, and there will be no reference to her at all. You may find this suppressive and an example of male domination, but it’s just the culture here.

And about the women?

As far as the women’s activities are concerned, I obviously cannot share anything meaningful since I will never be able to peer into their hidden lives. However, I will say that I have recently spoken to a female student at the school who explained to me that “It ain’t all that spectacular” as one might think. Still, I think it’s nice to have a part of society that is considered special and almost sacred in a way. And I still prefer to imagine the women walking around in their foo–foo dresses on tightropes with special indoor pyrotechnics and elaborate secret handshakes, and um…dancing monkeys. Or something like that.